As a career Naval officer, I've been deploying for much of the last ten years. As they say, however, having children changes everything. Going on deployment is so much harder when as you hold your infant twins you choke back the knowledge and fear that probably they will not even know you when you come back.

Our au pair is really a remarkable and uncharacteristically thoughtful woman. She doesn't just keep my children safe and happy while my wife is at work, nor does she merely provide the stable love of a consistent adult in their lives. She has, no less than walked into the chaotic lives of a military family, assessed the situation and provided care for our children better than anything we could have dreamed. She has strengthened our family's connection to each other in a very difficult time. She did so without being told to do so or instructed how to do so. She is a Godsend and I cannot imagine how different our year would have been without her.

She is a photographer. At first, we were pleased at the thought that our children's lives would be well documented. In reality, she has carefully documented every developmental step my children have taken and conscientiously posted photos for me to review when I have access to the internet. Because of her, I've seen my children sitting up, crawling, standing and walking. I've seen them feeding themselves solid foods. The lives of babies change so rapidly. This way, I will not have missed the whole year.

Before I left, she made a special frame for a photo of me in my uniform holding both babies on my lap. My wife came home from work the other day while the children were having their dinners. Our au pair was holding the photo for the children to see an explaining what she knows of my job: “Daddy is on his boat. He is thinking about you. He loves you. Can you say daddy?” My wife thanked her for taking that initiative, and she was surprised to be thanked. “We often talk about daddy,” She said. “I think it’s very important for them.” My wife just hugged her and cried.

She also helps me and my children connect on Skype. This way we can talk for a few minutes, even though I’m on the other side of the world. I can see them clapping, and playing and I know that they are happy and also that they haven’t forgotten me. I can’t tell you what it means to me.

Because of our au pair, I am able to do my job better. I know my family does just have great childcare, but a family member who willingly has taken on the challenges of joining a military family with intuition, understanding of our needs and the needs of our children, and grace.

We really, really love her and think she is the best Au Pair in the world. She is certainly the best au pair we ever could have imagined.